Posted on
01 April 2010, under
Dad-To-Be; More Dad-To-Be articles...
Second trimester
The second trimester runs from weeks 13-26, and during this time your partner is going to start looking more like a pregnant woman, and the realisation that you are actually going to become a dad will become more difficult to ignore. The risk of miscarriage is much lower once you have completed the first trimester, and a lot of couples begin spreading their good news around this time (before mum starts to show and give the game away!).
Mum-to-be:
In the early part of this trimester, the only visible changes will be that your partner will be carrying a little more weight on her tummy, and her breasts may have started to enlarge. Over the next few weeks she is going to show more, and will need to start wearing maternity clothes. These changes in her body can cause a mixture of pride, anticipation but also upset and fear of how her body is going to change over the next few months. It is important that you are sensitive to this and communicate this and support her at this time. (See The Supporting Role).
Things start to get a bit easier once you get into the second trimester. Morning sickness will recede for the majority of women, and fatigue will become less of a problem as the placenta develops and helps with baby’s nutrition. Some women feel very well during the middle months of pregnancy, and you may notice a “bloom” as her skin retains fluids making it firmer and smoother, and the increased circulation can give her a healthy glow – make sure to tell her this if you notice it. This improved sense of wellbeing, and the fact that your partner does not yet feel that she is the size of a small elephant, means that many couples find the middle trimester the most enjoyable part of the pregnancy.
During this time your partner may be subject to mood swings and cravings for certain foods. She will feel the baby move for the first time around weeks 20-22 (a few weeks earlier if this is not her first baby). In my own experience the most common description is of a “flutter”, and it is only when she gets used to feeling it that she is certain that she is feeling movement as it can be quite intermittent at this stage.
Dad-to-be:
At this stage of the pregnancy, especially when you have broken your good news, it is common to reflect on what is ahead of you. This can bring about worries about how you will cope, what type of a father you will be or more practical concerns e.g. re your finances. There are a number of books which guide a couple through the pregnancy, and some of these are written from the dad’s perspective and may help you as a bit of a roadmap to the whole process.
Many couples are concerned about sex during pregnancy. The first reality to acknowledge is that both of you may find that your libido may decrease during pregnancy, and part of this is often due to concerns that the baby could be harmed. The good news is that sex is very much allowed during pregnancy, and you might find your partner’s fuller figure even more appealing. Increased circulation in her nipples and vagina means that they may be more sensitive and more easily stimulated. The biggest obstacle to overcome will be her bump, and you will need to adapt your positions accordingly. If your partner bleeds after intercourse you should seek medical advice.
The name game will often start during this trimester. There are various books and websites to give suggestions, meanings etc, and the cso.ie website lists the most common names over the last few years. My only advice would be to come to some form of agreement between now and baby’s arrival – this avoids the situation where a friend of mine and his wife refer to their two year old son by two different names.
Medical Care During Pregnancy (Antenatal Care):
You will start to have more contact with your doctors during the second trimester. The main division in Antenatal Care in Ireland is between public and private care, and the main difference is the cost – public care is essentially free while private care will cost several thousand Euros. In some areas there are separate private hospitals, but for most people you will deliver in the same hospital whether you are a private or public patient. As a private patient you will see the consultant at every appointment in his Private Clinic, and you are more likely to have repeat scans at each appointment. In a Public Antenatal Clinic, you may be seen by one of the Senior House Officers or Registrars. The consultant (or another on-call consultant) is more likely to routinely attend during your labour if you are a private patient. I emphasise the word “routinely”, because in a complicated labour the obstetrician will always be involved, but most labours can be managed perfectly safely by the midwife.
Some hospitals also offer a Public Midwife led service whereby the pregnancy is managed in shared care between your GP and a team of Specialist Midwives, and one of the team of midwives attends for your labour. This service is available to uncomplicated pregnancies, and they may also offer a homebirth. The majority of women attend the public clinic, and most of their visits during the pregnancy are actually with your GP. The good news here is that there is no charge for GP antenatal care which is free whether you have a medical card or not.
It may not be practical for you to attend all of the Antenatal visits with your partner, but you should do your best to attend the appointments where the main ultrasound scans are performed – these are most commonly done around week 21 as the baby is well enough developed for some detail to be seen. Ultrasound is a perfectly safe way of imaging the baby by using high frequency sound waves. You will need to discuss whether you want to know the gender of the baby beforehand as it will be too late to try and agree as the ultrasound probe whizzes around your partner’s tummy. In recent years several commercial companies have started to offer 3D and 4D scans which show baby in more detail, and they provide pictures and DVDs of the experience.
At each antenatal visit, you get to discuss any problems that may have arisen. I generally suggest to couples that they write down any questions that they might have beforehand, as it is too easy to forget what you were going to ask while you are in the consultation. Your partner’s blood pressure will be measured, a test will be performed looking for various abnormalities in her urine, and her abdomen will be examined to see the size and position of the baby. The doctor may also use a probe placed on your partner’s tummy to listen to the baby’s heartbeat. There are a number of routine blood tests performed early in the pregnancy. These include blood tests for HIV, Hepatitis B, and syphilis, whether she is immune to rubella (German measles), and her Blood Group and Blood Count. The visits will become more frequent as the pregnancy progresses.
You can enquire about Antenatal Classes with your GP or in the antenatal clinic. These cover a variety of aspects of pregnancy, labour and parenthood, and are covered in a previous article. I was surprised to discover that the majority of first time parents do not attend them – there is plenty to learn and I would certainly recommend to prospective mothers and fathers to attend antenatal classes.
Baby’s Development:
During the second trimester baby grows from 7 cm long and weighing less than an ounce to about 23.5 cm long weighing 1 kg (2 lb 3 oz). At 20 weeks the top of your partner’s womb is up as high as her umbilicus. At this stage the baby’s head is bigger in proportion to its body, has a formed face, and baby is very lean with wrinkled skin as it has not yet started to put down any fat stores.
By the end of this trimester the limbs will be more developed and baby will look a lot more like what he will look like as a newborn. Baby opens his eyes for the first time at the end of this trimester. He will now be putting on weight at about 100 grams per week. He should still have another three months to finish his development, but modern medical care means that he will have a good chance of survival even if he is born at this stage.
Dr. Sean Hogan is a General Practitioner working in Waterford city. He went to college in UCC, and trained initially in Cork in a variety of medical speciallities. He then moved to Waterford, where he worked initially in hospital medicine before completing specialist General Practitioner training. His clinical interests include prevention of heart disease and diabetes, men's health and dermatology.
He feels strongly about the use of appropriate everyday language to explain medical terminology properly to patients, as he feels that this allows them to become more involved in their own healthcare. His other main qualifications for writing on fatherhood are Darragh (approaching his third birthday) and Ewan (aged six months).
Back to top ^